Areas of Practice
I help people in two ways. We discuss what they can do physically to calm themselves. We also talk about where the anxiety comes from and they learn ways to understand it and other ways to look at it.
About 40% of my practice is with couples. We look at what desires are not being attended to. The couple learns skills to stop the upsets early so they don’t grow from a difference of opinion into an argument or fight.
We discuss when how and where the depression came from. They learn what the trigger points are that produces the depression as well as coping skills to reduce the unwanted feelings. Possible uses of medications are often discussed.
Changes in life are inevitable. Sometimes these changes are hard adjustments, such as divorce, death of a loved one, or difficult job situations. I help people work through the sadness, grief, or loss related to these life changes. We also look to the future in order to not become stuck in the past.
LOVE AND RELATIONSHIPS- 28 THINGS TO CONSIDER
1. It’s best to start a relationship with the understanding that, “You are not me and we are both right.”
2. Everyone thinks that they are reasonable and, everyone feels that their sense of reasonableness is the right way to think.
3. Love can only be given as a gift, never forced or demanded.
4. All new romances have great highs. Old ones have great depth.
5. You should not have expectations of your partner without an agreement.
6. Contempt or apathy is at the root of most divorces.
7. Most often, men feel connected through sex. Women, most often, need to connect first, and then celebrate that connection in the bedroom.
8. When we first meet someone that interests us, we fill in the yet unknown
parts of them with how we want them to be.
9. It’s best to hold what is important to your partner with the same weight as that which is important to you.
10. A measure of a good relationship is not just how well you get along, but
how well you can resolve your differences.
11. Differences, when embraced, are the spice of a relationship.
12. A definition of intimacy is, “into-me-see.”
13. The partner who has the least desire for sex, controls the couple’s sex life.
14. Love without measure. Relationships are rarely 50-50.
15. In a good relationship there is no criticism, shame, or blame.
16. Avoid “always” and “never” statements as it creates defensiveness.
17. Decisions that involve both partners should be made by consensus.
18. By REALLY understanding how your partner was raised, you will tend to take their idiosyncrasies and complaints less personally.
19. Wives want to be cherished. Husbands want to be admired for their competency.
20. When trust has been broken, it can come back. However, it takes longer than you think.
21. It’s not our partner’s job to make us happy. Each of us is responsible for our own happiness.
22. It is a “conscious” decision every day to love your partner and see the best in them.
23. One of the most bonding things a couple can do is laugh together.
24. Many affairs occur when one partner feels “dead” inside and the affair helps them feel “alive”.
25. It’s easier to start an affair than to end it.
26. People react to their partner’s tone of voice more than their words.
27. The most important attribute for longevity in a relationship is patience.
28. Sarcasm can injure your partner if not said in a loving context.
By Andy Wald